Why I Don't Do "Sexy"

Sexy:  (adj) 1. Concerned predominately or excessively with sex; risqué.

2. Sexually interesting or exciting; radiating sexuality.

3. Excitingly appealing; glamorous.

Victoria’s Secret. Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. Abercrombie and Fitch. American Apparel. Miss America, even.

We see these things and one word reverberates that describes it all:

Sexy.

This word is used to describe things that are glorifying sexuality. The word denotes an idea of being proud and revealing your body to the world. It describes one who walks around flaunting herself.

Here is my question: Is ‘sexy’ something the Christian woman should aspire to be?

People may try to use the excuse that, if God made them, shouldn’t they be proud in how they created them? We are, after all, “fearfully and wonderfully made.” What’s wrong with showing pride in that? Why not strut our stuff? Why not be proud of your assets?

Here are the reasons why we don’t embrace the Sexy mindset.

1.       We aren’t out to be obsessed with appearance.

In a world where people are coveting the life of the Kardashians, we have forgotten something.  Our hearts.

In the verses about modesty, it says that our main concern should not be on our appearance, but our hearts. To God, ‘gentle and quiet spirits’ are precious to Him. (1st Peter 3:4.) Gentle and quiet spirits are humble, kind, and see to the needs of others before self. How much different is that from the mindset people have today?

1st Timothy 2:9-10 says: “Likewise also that the women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control…but with what is proper for women who profess Godliness-with good works.” (emp. Added.)

Philippians 2:3 says: “Do nothing of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others before yourselves.” (emp. Added.)

How much different would our society be if women focused serving God and others before how they look? Many women hate to go out without their makeup and hair done perfectly!

For thousands of years, women have gone to extreme measures to be beautiful. It is so easy for us to base our worth on our appearance. When we focus too much on how we look, less focus is put on God. Our appearance becomes an idol.

2.       We aren’t to “parade” ourselves.

If there is one quality that doesn’t fit in with the Christian lifestyle, it is Pride. Part of sexiness is parading your body or outfit around for the whole world to see. It is exuding a “Look at me!” attitude. We’ve all seen people like this. Not only does it not fit in with the idea of modesty, but it isn’t loving either. “Love does not parade itself. It is not filled with pride…” (1st Corinthians 13:4.)

This may be one of the main reasons for modesty. Modesty represents a quiet humility that God commands of us. (1 Peter 3:4.) If we are to be noticed for anything, the bible says, it should be for the good things that we do. Not our outfit or our body. Our clothes should allow our actions to speak louder.

3.       Our Bodies are Not Our Own.

Our bodies are the temple of the Living God. (1st Corinthians 6:19-20.) They are to be used as vessels for God’s glory. (Colossians 3:17.) “Sexy” puts the focus on us rather than God.  “Sexy” makes an idol of ourselves and the idea that we have to be perfect all the time. 

When our focus is on Him, we are set free from the idea that we have to please anyone but Him. We aren’t out to make other women jealous. We aren’t held to the idea that if men don’t find us attractive, we don’t have value. We aren’t held to pride in ourselves and our beauty. In the end, none of these things will bring true fulfillment like Christ can. All of these things will lose their luster and turn to dust.

4.       Sexy has one place. And one place only…

God made us to be attractive and beautiful. If there is any place where being sexy glorifies God, it is in the marriage bed. There, we are cherished by someone who loves us. One day, if it is meant to be, you will marry and meet the love of your life.

Sex is not dirty. Nor is it bad. The bible never says this, unless it is done in a way that goes against God’s word.

“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”-Hebrews 13:4

The allure of the world is strong. It is normal to want to be desired. To an extent, that is okay when you have that longing in the confines of scripture. God made marriage to have those needs fulfilled. 

But you know, you ARE cherished by God, our heavenly Father! You were made by Him, and He loves you. There is no need to try to measure up or be like everyone else. There is no need to.

Simple Truths-More than just Kid Stuff

I have always loved cartoons,  animation, and stories for children. That is one thing that hasn’t changed about me. More than likely, it never will.  I hear people say all the time, “Oh, that movie was cute, but it is just for kids.”

The truth is, there are things like Disney movies that ring such simple truths. I think as adults, we often want to ignore them. We think there is nothing we can learn from them because we’ve “heard it all before”.

Adults are stubborn. I think we often write off these “cute movies” or books because we often don’t want to face reality. 

We don’t want to hear that “a little kindness goes a long way”. 

We don’t want to hear that “Love is putting others needs before your own.” 

We don’t want to hear that we must persevere and keep trying. We don't want to hear that when it is easier to give up. 

We don’t want to hear that we need to stand up for what we believe in, or what is right.

We often turn a blind eye and stay silent when others are hurting, abused, or in need. We tell ourselves to mind our own business.

We walk away from someone just because they aren’t giving us a thrill anymore. They aren’t making ME happy. (Note: I am not talking about abusive situations. Please, if you can help it, don't stay in an abusive situation.)

We stay silent because it’s easier than dealing with conflict.

We give up because it feels better to be comfortable than to grow.

Each one of the things above are things we tell ourselves every day. We try to do everything we can to avoid these situations.

As Christians, we have to stop avoiding them. Not only are these things “kid-movie worthy”, but they’re also biblical. Pride prevents us from being convicted.

Kindness and agape (self-sacrificial) love are commandments of God. (1st Corinthians 13:4-8, Ephesians 4:32.)

We are to speak up with the truth that will save the world. We are not to be ashamed. (Ephesians 4:15, Galatians 6:1, Matthew 28:19, Romans 1:16.)

We are to grow, examine our hearts, and be open to conviction. (2nd Corinthians 13:5, 1 John 1:9, 1 Tim. 4:15, 2 Peter 3:18.)

I am not saying that everyone should have to watch Disney movies or cartoons. I am saying that sometimes the “simplest truths” are the most important. And, the fact that they are first from God makes them all the more important.

Put On Your War Paint!!!!!

One of my sisters faced a difficult situation yesterday. You could see in her face that she was heartbroken.

One thing I remember Mom saying to her was, “When you wake up, put on your war paint!” 

She meant that, the next day, get up and do your makeup. Make your hair pretty. Despite whatever may be going on, it helps to keep taking care of yourself. It helps to keep doing what you need to do. Cry if you need to, get angry. Rest. But, keep moving forward, no matter what.

It made me think about the situation in our nation right now with the election. We are at a crossroads in our nation’s history. We are at a questionable time in Church history as well. There is no telling what is around the corner.

I know two things. First, God is still in charge. Second, as the Church we need to get up and work. We need to also get down on our knees and pray like we have never prayed before. As my Mom said to my sister, we need to get our war paint on, spiritually speaking.

Forget politics as they apply to secular issues for the moment (economics, healthcare, etc.). While I have opinions on those things, in the light of God’s word, they  don’t matter in the end.

 It doesn’t matter who is president. It doesn’t matter if we don’t care for our Government Officials. Our job, as Christians, is to obey the law of the land. We are to respect our leaders and the rules. We are to be in submission to them.  (Romans 13:1-7)

As Christians, our ultimate job is to spread the Gospel. Our purpose is to tell others about God. What the US doesn’t need right now is more Christians obsessed with politics. No. What the US needs is for the Church to be the Church.

We need to get our hands dirty. (Eph. 4:28, James 2:17.)

We need to Study God’s Word. (2nd Tim. 2:15, 2 Tim. 3:14-17.)

We need to preach the Gospel. (Matt. 28:19.)

We need to help the poor. We are the Church. The government is not. Stop trying to make it their job. (Luke 3:11, Luke 12:23, Matt. 25:35-40)

Visit, help, mentor, or even adopt those in foster care. (James 1:27.)

Visit the sick and lonely. (Matt. 25:35-40, 2nd Cor. 1:3-5.)

Love the abused and broken.  (2nd Cor. 1:3-5, Romans 12:15.)

Give unconditional love to all despite their sins or circumstances. (1 Cor. 13:4-7.)

Tell them of the healing and forgiveness that God can give. (2 Cor. 1:3-5.)

Get on our knees and pray for this nation and the world. (1 Tim. 2:1-4.)

This is putting on our war paint. This is how a Christian goes to battle. This is putting on the full armor of God. (Eph. 6:10-18.) Getting up and working and being an example changes things.

We can scream until we are blue in the face about the morals in this nation. The screaming isn’t working. 

We cannot make an impact unless we are what God has called us to be. We must be ready each moment for opportunities we receive. We must be ready to work. We must stop being afraid. 

This is what Christians need to be doing right now, no matter what happens this year. Now until Jesus comes back. It’s time to paint up for battle!

Singles, BE GRATEFUL!

Ah, Valentine’s day. That day of the year when couples drown each other in love.

 And also the day that singles lament their singleness.

I am single. But, I hate it when people get so down in the dumps about being single on the holiday. I remember a few years ago my first boyfriend broke up with me just before Valentine’s day. If anyone had a reason to hate the holiday that year, it would have been me.

I was staying with some friends at the time. The two of them went and bought me a Hawaiian pizza for me to have all to myself. While I was still in deep hurt, I also so felt so blessed and thankful that they did something like that for me.

Even now, I have no disdain for the holiday. I never have. Valentine’s day doesn’t make me lament the love I don’t have. Actually, quite the opposite. If anything, it reminds me of how blessed I am. 

While I don’t have a lover, I have many who love me. I have a wonderful family that is always there for me. I have precious little sisters who make my heart overflow. I have fantastic friends that have blessed my life in so many ways. God is my constant. He is faithful. He loves me and takes care of me.

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son, that whosoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)

“But God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for the ungodly.” (Romans 5:8)

“Humble yourselves under God’s mighty hand so that at a proper time, He will life you up. Cast all your anxieties on Him, for He cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:6-7)

Everyone wants a special someone. I know I do. I will find him eventually. But I don’t want to spend my life being sad about being single. I don’t want to be angry or depressed when Valentine’s rolls around. On Valentine’s day, I want to see the immense love that is  around me right now.

On Valentine’s Day, celebrate God’s love, and the love of those around you. Do it year ‘round. Whether you are single or not, be thankful for the love you have. Return it tenfold!

“Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor." (Romans 12:10)

Why the Extinction of the Black Rhino Matters

https://image.freepik.com/free-photo/black-rhino_2939883.jpg

Yesterday, I found out that the Western Black Rhino was declared extinct. That breaks my heart.

Here’s the thing. The rhinoceros wasn’t declared extinct because of natural causes. It has gone extinct because of greed. Poaching. People got so obsessed with money that they killed them off.

I don’t want to be misunderstood in this post. I understand that as the church, our first priority should be people. I understand that our main goal is leading people to Christ. I would never, ever, put anything else above that.

Greed is the sin at the heart of most extinctions. Plain and simple. That is the main thing I want to discuss in this article. 

In the United States, the idea of the American Dream has permeated everything we do. We are obsessed with having it all. We are obsessed with our homes being prettier than the next. We have to have the absolute best of everything. We are wasteful. 

Our nation is greedy. Plain and simple. We have too long ignored this sin. We obsess over that next big thing we want to buy. We give as little as possible. We fill our houses with stuff we don’t need. In reality, that money could have gone towards something better.

I am not saying there is anything  wrong with having these things. Yet, we need to consider our true intent. Is there any way to use those things to God’s glory?  Will this item just get lost in the piles of junk we don’t ever use? Am I really, truly going to use this? If the answer is no, yes, and no, we should try and reconsider. 

I think of the parable of the talents in Matthew 24:18-30. The wicked servants buried or didn’t do anything with their talents.  Same thing with us. What are we doing with God’s blessings? Burying them and keeping them to ourselves? Or are we sharing them with the world? Compared to the rest of the world, we've been blessed with great material wealth. 

How do the rhinoceros, bees, butterflies and other endangered animals tie into this?

Read this verse in Genesis chapter one:

“And God blessed them. And God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.’ And God said, ‘Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the face of the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit…” (Genesis 1:28-29, emp. added.)

Notice something. He gave us every plant. He put all the animals under our rule and care. Wouldn’t you say that this earth is a gift to us from God?

What if you gave someone a gift? A handmade one? You picked out everything to be perfect for them. You worked hard on it. How would you feel to find out that person tosses that item around carelessly? They walk all over it. They are rough with it. They break it and don’t seem to care.

God gave this earth as a gift for us to use. Everything on this earth is at our disposal for our needs, and even our wants. However, many use it selfishly.


In the case of the rhinoceros, people’s hearts became ravaged with greed. They hunted without any regard for what might happen. People forget that once you destroy an entire animal population, the reason you did goes with it.

We can't be that bad, right? I mean, hey, it’s not like I’m an extortioner. It’s not like I am blackmailing anyone. And I definitely am not a poacher. So, I must be okay right?

Greed takes many forms. The rich young ruler was greedy (Matthew 19:16-22.). He had many possessions. But he wasn’t willing to give it up for Jesus. He had so much and gave so little. We don’t want to admit it or want to face it--

--but the rich young ruler is us. 

We believe with all our hearts that we are good people. We have so much, and give so little.

This sin has recently come to focus in my life. And I think it is a problem for most people in our western society. But I don’t want to be one of them. I don’t want an obsession with stuff. I want to be a good steward. As with the case of the rich young ruler, we HAVE to want God more than anything else.

This is why the rhino extinction matters. We are to be good stewards of God’s blessings. Animals are one of those blessings. What is our response to God's blessings? We abuse and waste every good and perfect thing He gives us. That is one of the ways sin works.

I am not saying we have to run around with picket signs. I am not saying we have to go around shouting, “SAVE THE ELEPHANT!” or, “SAVE THE BEES!”

 I am saying that to change these things, we have to choose God over money, stuff, and  selfishness. We must teach others to do the same. When we decide to be good stewards and overcome greed, these things can change. 

Are You Ready for the Most Unexpected Event in the World?

A few early mornings ago, I was asleep; like every other person in the house. Well, not every person. It was about 3:40 in the morning. Ear-piercing screams began to rattle through my door. I jolt awake and realize it is my little sisters screaming their heads off. The first thought in my mind was that someone had broken in and was terrorizing my sisters.

I rushed out of my room, ready to fight whatever demented person had wandered in. Then, I see three little girls come rushing out of one of their bedrooms. They were panicking and screaming. In my sleepy stupor, I found it odd that they were  dressed in their Sunday dresses. The youngest girl also had eyeliner on. Between the screams and repeated words of “We’re dead we’re dead we're dead…..”  and “WE’RE GOING TO DIE!”,  I caught that there was flooding going on in one of the bathrooms.

Sure enough, one of the sinks was lying on the ground, completely detached from the wall. Water was squirting and spraying everywhere like a banged up artery. To make matters worse, the basement was flooding. The basement ceiling tiles were scattered everywhere.

Well, if you’re going to make a mess that early in the morning, might as well go big or go home. (Or, er, go somewhere else because we were already at home!)

The girls also described how none of them could get back to sleep. So, they decided to get ready for school…at 3:00 in the morning. Which is why they were up playing dress up at unholy hours of the morning.

I am not sure I have ever experienced such craziness early in the morning.

This brings me to the point of this article. Life is about the unexpected. As prepared as we think we are (or convince ourselves we are) life happens. There are many things in life that we can’t control. (Such as little munchkins getting up early and making a mess.)

The biggest thing we can’t control is God. He lives outside our realm of understanding and human ideas. He knows everything that is going to happen, and when. He knows when we are going to do this or that. He knows when we will die.

Moreover, He knows the day the world will end.

God says that day will come as a “thief in the night”. (1 Thess. 5:2) When it comes to being prepared, His return is the one thing we CAN be ready for. It takes faith. It also takes submission. It is to allow God to rule every single part of your life. When Jesus finally comes back, be honest with yourself. Will you be ready? Can you be confident that when you stand before God you are filled with Him? Overflowing with Him?

We can never do enough to earn our salvation. However, we accept His grace by obeying Him, and allowing Him to rule our lives. When we truly want God in our life, it will show. It will show because we will sin less. We will sin less because we want more of God than we do of ourselves. We will want to know what God wants from us, so we study His word hungrily. We will love others. Speak more kindly to them. We will be more willing to help others than to walk by them without a second glance. We will declare God’s name. We will boast of God’s great love. 

There is a Great Day coming. A day when the Church and those who aren’t in the Church will be separated. A day that is full of sorrow and terror. There is a day coming that is glad and joyful. There is a day coming that those who deny God will be humbled. There is a day coming that those who love Him and are looking for Him will want to run and embrace their Savior. There will be relief. There will be pain. There will be the Lost, and there will be the saved. There is no in-between. 

Don't be taken unaware by His return. Repent, put on the Lord in baptism, and live for Him from this day forward. Things like flooding in your home can take you by surprise. Don't let Jesus' return take you by surprise.

It's the Little Things....

I am sure a lot of us feel this way sometimes. I recently began to wonder if I was doing enough for God.  I began to pray for more opportunities. Of course, I was thinking big scale-like mission trips.

So I prayed about it. I asked Him to help me not forsake opportunities to give, to love, to share. I wanted to do all the big things. Not out of pride, but because I really, really want God to use me to my full capacity. I want to serve Him and honor Him.

However, the more I looked at my life, the more I realized that I am in no place to do the “big things” yet. I began feeling bad about it. My circumstances at the moment prevent me from doing those things right now.

Then it began to occur to me...maybe I just need to stop worrying about what I can’t do for now. What if I just need to look at the opportunities around me?

I think about my little sisters at the children’s home. These little girls have been neglected, abused, and who knows what else.  I love them so much. What if right now, God wants me to minister to and love the little girls at the home?

I had a conversation with my Aunt tonight about my concerns about whether I was doing enough. She reminded me the impact of the “little things”. She talked about how she has seen God work, from her simply being kind or being there for someone. We need to work with what we have. We can bear much fruit by serving with our whole heart. Having a willing, servant’s heart is the key. Keeping eyes open for opportunities around us is also key.

“Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men.”-Colossians 3:23

When we fully submit to God, we say, “I am available for You to use me in anyway. Anything You want me to do, I will do it.”

Sometimes, the Lord needs you where you already are.  It can be difficult when you want to do the big things. I continue to pray that someday I will be able to serve in a mission field. However, God is showing me right now that there are a group of girls who need my love and example.

My foster sisters have come to mean the world to me. They need that unconditional love and support. They need to see God.  I must show that love to them. It could happen one day they give their lives to Christ. Then they can tell the world what God has done for them. It would have started with the fact that we loved them.

Believe it or not, loving those around us and giving them the gospel is a great place to start. Even if something seems little, it can lead to big things.

If you are in the same spot as me, remember- you don’t have to be doing the “big things” now. Pray about it. If you have that big of a heart for missions, or anything else, God will offer the opportunity when the time is right. Just maybe not right now. Patience is a virtue.