Thursday, May 30, 2013

Finding Motivation in Self-Acceptance

Okay, okay; I know that blogs on self image and self worth have been done so many times, but I thought up a side to it that I hadn't thought of to write down before.

Just recently, I've been undertaking the process of losing weight. I'm very proud to say that I've lost over 50 lbs. I'm eating better in terms of the types of foods I eat and the portions I am eating.

I've never lost this much before. Normally, I'll make it to about 30, and then I'm unable to lose anymore. Then, I get discouraged, eat more, and gain the weight back. Meh.

I kind of realize now what the main problem was.

Back then at the previous times I tried losing weight, my self esteem was terrible. I really had almost no confidence in myself. I looked in the mirror and hated myself inside and out for the person I'd become.

Over the years, I had been told in so many ways (subtly and unsubtly) that the only way for you to get the motivation to lose weight was to hate and despise the way you looked.

I knew it was probably silly to think that way. Yet, because I didn't have any other reason to take care of myself, I kind of thought at the time that it was the only way.

My journey has been a long one. First, was realizing that I have a God who created and loves me. Second, fully realizing deep down to your heart, (not just knowing it-but understanding it) that you are beautiful on the inside. Third, my self-worth needs to come from the Lord. All of these things I have written about before.

You see, at this point I've realized something: when you love something, really love something, you're more likely to go out of your way to take care of it. We go out of our way to help loved ones; our siblings, husbands, boyfriends, mothers, fathers, grandparents, our relationship with God, etc.

Why? Because we love them. What about ourselves?

We MUST stop hating on our bodies. When we learn to love and accept them, only then do I believe we can really get the desire to take better care of it and maintain a lifetime of health. Because, seriously-why would we take care of something we don't really love and care about that much anyway?

Also, when you don't have a healthy dose of self-love, other areas of your life suffer. Your relationships suffer. You cause your loved ones to worry about you and your health. You begin comparing yourself and hating other women because they have something you don't. Your relationship with God suffers because you're focused too much on self to worry about it.

My weight loss is now mostly because I want to be a healthier me-not necessarily because I want to look better. I want to treat myself well so God can use me better for His purposes, and so I can do more for my loved ones. It'll be nice to fit into some smaller sizes (I'm not going to lie about that) but my mindset has changed dramatically in what my priorities are health wise.

So, what I am basically saying is that we must learn to love ourselves and when we do, you find that it's easier to find the motivation to take better care of yourself.

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